Ecclesiastes 3:1-8

"There is an appointed time for everything. And there is a time for every event under heaven. A time to give birth and a time to die; A time to plant and a time to uproot what is planted. A time to kill and a time to heal; A time to tear down and a time to build up. A time to weep and a time to laugh; A time to mourn and a time to dance. A time to throw stones and a time to gather stones; A time to embrace and a time to shun embracing. A time to search and a time to give up as lost; A time to keep and a time to throw away. A time to tear apart and a time to sew together; A time to be silent and a time to speak. A time to love and a time to hate; A time for war and a time for peace." Ecclesiastes 3:1-8

Friday, November 25, 2011

It's such a blessing to have all our families near-by. However when it comes to holidays - it gets tricky. How to spend time with both sides of the family, without getting wore out? I mean, we want to spend time with both of them, but in all honesty, I prefer my family. We play games, we talk, we're close. My in-laws... there's some verbal pleasantries exchanged, but its not "close" feeling and we don't play games - just eat, a lil visiting and then leave.
This Thanksgiving we had planned to meet at my sisters early so we could all put our kids down for naps and play games. We had time for only 1 game. :(  and then we had to leave to the next family before we could have dessert. I totally miss just hanging out with my family.
In all honesty, with having 2 kids next year, I really don't want to do the 2 family run each holiday, so I'm conflicted about what to do. I totally prefer my families food, because it's what I grew up eating. Stuff I know and love.
This year because we ran out, we didn't get to make "take home" plates, and thankfully my family did split up the turkey and yams... but that was all we got for left overs. Pretty quite disappointing. I had made mashed potatoes, and I guess there were none of those left over?
I have come to realize I have expectations for the holidays and the next day when I want some left over dessert or something... I feel jipped.
It was my fault for not making a take-home plate in the 1st place. So its not anyone's fault... just a bummer.

When I shared my let-downs, my DH said we should just start alternating holidays with family. I guess we can... but in all honesty, I know I will be really disappointed to not see my family on a thanksgiving. I've accepted that I no longer get to do the Big Townley-side family thing on Christmas Eve for the last 3 years... since we do Christmas with the in-laws that night. And usually Easter with his family. And 4th of July... hhmmmm... wow... I gues I have never wrote this out, becuase I have never realized that the only holidays we DO get with my family is Christmas Day (they get us Christmas Eve tho, so doesn't that cancel out?) and half of Thanksgiving...

Maybe this is why subconsciously I have such a hard time on holidays. Nothing like what I grew up with. Of course the "Christian" holidays like Christmas & Easter DH has to work anyways, so that's really different already. Something I'm still processing and learning to accept in a way.

How do other people do it with families that are all in town?

I would LOOOOVE to just have them all get together, but I know that is WAY too many people for any of our homes and not what the in-laws would enjoy. We did do Easter at our home when I was pregnant, had the in-laws and 2 sisters and their families over. My parents were out of town and my other sister still lived out of state, so it was smaller than it is now.

I know that every season keeps changing... and I think that I find that disturbing as well, that I can't just know what its going to be like every year. Next year we'll have 2 kids and my other sister will have a kid, and so we're still growing. At some point we'll have to start doing our own I know, and that makes me kinda sad.
Who knows... maybe we won't. Just what is swimmin around my head and needed to get it out.

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